A “people pleaser” is one who feels compelled to please others even to their own hurt. It often stems from a desire for the approval of others and can lead one to becoming a prisoner of the opinions of whomever they are around. It is to allow the desires of others to determine how life will be approached. That does not bring stability to life, but instead a constant wavering and giving in to the desires of whomever one is with at the moment. And though we ought not to be totally self-centered, our life must still be centered on the right things to bring stability to not only our emotional health, but also to our spiritual wellbeing.
Years ago the statement was often made, “You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all of the people all of the time.” (Often attributed to Abraham Lincoln.) This is merely a reflection of the variation of human desires and thinking in this world. Though we may not like to be disliked, as someone has duly noted, “You must develop the ability to be disliked in order to free yourself from the prison of other people’s opinions.” (Mark Manson)
What matters most to us? And what will bring us the greatest stability? It is not in turning to the wide array of the world’s thinking (note James 3:14-16), but to the consistency drawn from the “wisdom from above”. (note James 3:17-18)
Remember when Peter and the other apostles were told to quit speaking in the Name of Jesus, their response to the Jewish leaders is noted where we read. . .
“(29) But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than men.” (Acts 5:29 ESV)
And as Paul was warning those at Galatia to not turn to a different gospel — which was really no gospel at all, but rather a distortion of the gospel of Christ (Galatians 1:6-9) — he noted his own focus in stating. . .
“(10) For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (Galatians 1:10 ESV)
Rather than being “people pleasers”, it is clear with Peter and the other apostles and also with Paul that their focus rested on obeying and pleasing God! This is the only way to bring consistency and stability to our life. Therefore, rather than the unrest of being tossed about by the varying desires around us, let us weather the storm of opinion by seeking the approval of God above all. When we are disliked and hated for where we stand, as Jesus told His disciples, “(18) If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you.” (John 15:18 ESV) Rather than being a slave to worldly opinion, may we remain servants of Christ living by the wisdom from above!
Have a great day LIVING LIFE TO PLEASE THE LORD!
Carl
