“Saying is sometimes easier than listening and so listening may be easier said than done.” (Carl. W. Hanson 07/13/2014) Do you hear what I’m saying?
James exhorted. . .
“(19) Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; (20) for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” (James 1:19-20 ESV)
Jumping to hear and not speaking too quickly protects us from jumping to the wrong conclusion and into an angry response. Though there is the kind of anger that has been referred to as “righteous indignation”, the anger James referred to here is not righteous because it “does not produce the righteousness of God.” Therefore, we are to engage in righteous (right) listening.
Perhaps to become a righteous listener, it would help to understand what kind of listener not to be. Consider the following list someone has composed of the wrong kind of listeners.
The Mind Reader: The one who hears little or nothing because they are thinking, “What is this person really thinking or feeling?”
The Rehearser: The one who tunes out the speaker while doing mental tryouts for “Here’s what I’ll say next.”
The Filterer: The one involved in selective listening; hearing only what they want to hear.
The Dreamer: The one allowing their mind to drift off during a face-to-face conversation, placing themselves in the embarrassing position of having to ask, “What did you say?” or “Would you repeat that?”
The Identifier: The one who refers everything to their own experience and so probably not really hearing what has been said.
The Comparer: The one who gets sidetracked assessing the messenger and thus missing the real message.
The Derailer: The one who changes the subject too quickly, thus revealing to the other there is little or no interest in what is actually being said.
The Sparrer: The one who belittles or discounts what is said and thus falls into the same class as the derailer.
The Placater: The one who agrees with everything heard, just to be nice and avoid conflict. This does not necessarily make one a good listener.
Being a good listener with a genuine interest in others will help us respond in beneficial ways. When we are seen as such, others will more likely be willing to give us their ear as well. Though many speech classes may be taught, let us focus to fall into the class of righteous listeners.
Have a great day BEING THE LISTENER OTHERS NEED!
Carl
