One of the best pieces of advice that I was told by my mother is, “Never write down anything that you wouldn’t say in person. You cannot erase what you’ve written down.” This has never been more true in our society and connected world than it is today.
I grew up in a time without online social media and without a camera in everyone’s pocket, so I did not have access to “posts” and “status updates,” nor did we communicate with text messages quite like we do today. I never realized just how relevant my mother’s advice would end up being.
My mother also used to advise me to “Say it in my head twice before speaking out loud. If it sounds wrong in your head, it will definitely sound wrong out loud.” This advice most certainly works for social media posts, online comments, texting, and any other “written” form of communication that we have available today.
Since we have so many forms of written and recorded communication today, I want to challenge you with a new way to approach every status update and online interaction: Think before you S.E.N.D. It’s a simple acronym, but one that I know you will find useful as you navigate the connected and online world that we live in.
S – Is it SINFUL? James 3 speaks about just how easily we sin with our tongue. While the things we write down are not necessarily spoken, they are certainly things that we “say,” just in written form. James teaches us that, “So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire…” (James 3:5-6, ESV). We can certainly cause a lot of trouble and sin in our lives with our words, written or otherwise, and we must ask ourselves before hitting “Send,” “Is what I am about to say SINFUL?” If yes, then you must certainly refrain from hitting the “Send” button.
E – Will it ENCOURAGE? 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing” (ESV). Just before this, in verse 9, the inspired writer Paul mentions that we are not destined for wrath, but rather to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. One of the many ways that we exhibit and display our faith is by encouraging and lifting one another up. Ask yourself, “Could what I am about to say and send encourage someone to Christ?” If yes, then you are, at least, on the right track to hitting “Send.”
N – Is it NECESSARY? This one can tie into the previous question of “Will it encourage?” but is still a bit different. We need to make sure that what we want to say or write is actually something that needs to be said. We should always speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) and encourage one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11), but voicing our opinions, particularly on matters that are not Scriptural issues, is not always going to be the most encouraging approach.
Online arguments are, more often than not, fruitless in their ability to persuade and teach others. That is not to say that you cannot participate in fruitful conversations online, but if the conversation, opinion, or comment is not necessary, it is likely not encouraging either and may even lead us into sin.
D – Would you say it DIRECTLY to this person? Once again, my mother was right on the money with this one. If what you are willing to say online, in a text, or on a social media platform about someone is not something that you would say directly to that person, then it is time to rethink hitting the “Send” button. As mentioned earlier, saying something online that you would not say in front of a person is very likely to be a fruitless endeavor. Proverbs 16:28 says, “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends” (ESV).
We can see that saying or writing something online or even texting another person to spread rumors or gossip brings destruction and chaos to our lives. If we are spreading strife instead of love, we are falling into sin. And if what we are writing is sinful, then we should avoid sending the message – and avoid engaging in gossip altogether.
If we practice asking ourselves these questions prior to posting online, sending a text message, or writing a DM to others online, we will put ourselves in a position to be godly, to be holy, and to be set apart from the forces of evil and sin that ultimately separate us from God.
So, remember to always think before you S.E.N.D.!
